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Dan Dunkin is a professional writer and devoted father to 2 teenagers. Dan has a 30-year newspaper career winning numerous awards covering sports and related topics.
July 24, 2012Net Nanny for Android 2.0
May 26, 2017
Divorced and separated parents have a host of issues that led to their breakup, and a lot of things they’ll never agree on. But when it comes to the importance of monitoring and protecting their children (and fast-growing teenagers) on the internet and social media, differences need to be put aside.
The confusion that divorce often brings a child can be manifested in the endless and sometimes dangerous online world. With both parents on the same page, a plan that is consistent at both households makes this all too often challenging part of co-parenting easier.
Jaime Humphries Davis, a family lawyer in Florida, suggests “Separated and divorced parents in particular, should be consistent in their rules for technology.” She adds, “The rules for technology usage should be the same at mom's house as they are at dad's.” Another expert at Peter Morris Law Firm suggests, “Having consistent rules between both households is one of the best ways to give your kids a sense of stability and continuity. It also helps you build trust with your co-parent.”
This is easier said than done in many two household families. One parent may not prioritize this relatively new dynamic of raising kids. At one house, the child has open-ended access; at the other, defined limits. Any discernible disparity would bother one parent and requires a co-parenting conversation.
How can divorced or separated parents with different priorities or philosophies about their kids’ internet and social media use unify in this context, or at least reach a happy medium that is deemed healthy for the child? Here are some basic tenets to follow to help bridge the gulf:
There may not be a perfect solution. The divorced parents may not completely agree. The teen may not be doing cartwheels that he or she now has set limits at both houses on time and site visits. But a broken family having come together over a very important topic, and for the good of their children, brings more trust and future productive conversations between the parents, and most of all, a stronger sense of stability, security, good judgment, clarity and love for the child.
Parental control software options help parents make their agreed upon rules easier to enforce with custom settings to choose the type of site to block and filter, as well as, what hours of the day the internet should be paused on your child’s device no matter which home they may be living on any particular day.