The Official Net Nanny Blog

Connected Toys Are the Weak Security Link

“Internet of Things” and “smart homes” are the latest trends to see a major upswing in the world today.

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Donna Rice Hughes of Enough is Enough (enough.org) recently commented on Facebook's new geolocation service.

"In a news conference yesterday, Facebook's CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced Facebook's new geolocation service, "Facebook Places".  This feature allows Facebook users to share where they are and with whom they are with in real-time from the user's mobile device.  As we have seen with any new technology or application available, these features can be used for good or for harm.
 

Facebook's New "Places" option

Donna Rice Hughes of Enough is Enough (enough.org) recently commented on Facebook's new geolocation service."In a news conference yesterday, Facebook's CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced Facebook's new geolocation service, "Facebook Places".

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In Candeo's full recovery training program, our Students learn about the brain science behind human sexual process. To describe what happens in the brain during sexual activity, we use the illustration of a “funnel which looks like an hour glass. Whenever we become sexual, the brain travels as it were into the funnel where it immediately begins narrowing its focus with the aid of powerful neuro-chemicals. The brain continues down into the funnel, until it reaches the very narrowest part which is sexual climax. Following that crescendo, the brain emerges from the narrow part of the funnel and returns to its normal, wide perspective. 

In the Candeo training, Students learn about The Funnel and The Narrowing Process, both from the perspective of a healthy sexual relationship and the experience of pornographic process. Thus there is a “healthy sexuality funnel and a “pornography funnel. While the neuro-chemical and brain processes are very similar in both of these funnels, the results when one emerges from each funnel is very different. 

In addition to the mentally/emotionally healthy vs. unhealthy aspects of each funnel, there is another important aspect to the Tale of the Two Funnels—the male and female brains are structured differently, causing men and women to approach and respond differently in the funnel.

As you read through this article, take time to think of experiences in your own relationship when you have seen these differences manifested. Also pay attention to how you believe pornographers exploit men and women according to their unique brain characteristics.
Men and Women Are Different    

Although what follows has been meticulously gathered from the research and writings of leading scientists and psychologists, it is by no means a hard and fast rule or description of every man and every woman. Each person is different and unique. 

However, the facts clearly bear out that for nearly all men and women there are significant differences between the male and female brain. This means that, in most cases, men and women do not behave, feel, think or respond in the same ways, either on the inside or in their outside behavior. Recently, while teaching a marital relations workshop, I asked the audience, “By a show of hands, how many would agree that men and women don't always think alike? Every hand immediately shot up, at which, one woman blurted out, “Do they ever

Women are “Web-Thinkers and
Men are “Step-Thinkers
 

Helen Fisher in her book The First Sex, refers to women as using “web thinking, as opposed to the “step thinking men are usually engaged in. Women place an emphasis on the “whole, while males focus primarily on the “parts of the whole. It's female multi-tasking vs. male's do-one-thing-at-a-time mentality. 
 

One example of this single tasking vs. multi-tasking difference is in communication. Nothing amazes me more than watching a group of women talk to each other—all at once! From the male brain perspective this is incomprehensible. When men talk, they take turns: “Go ahead, and when you're done let me know so I can talk. Once, after observing my wife and her friends engage in this female phenomenon, I tested her: “I know you couldn't hear everything that was being said—you were all faking it. To my dismay, she was able to recount details of the entire conversation for me! Searching for a simple comparison that everyone can relate to, some scientists refer to the narrowing/single-tasking male brain as a “meat cleaver, as opposed to the holistic/multi-tasking female brain as more like a “Swiss Army Knife, with its many attachments. I like to think of women as having a giant satellite dish on their heads, spinning around, taking everything in.

These differences center around how men and women use the right and left hemispheres of their brains. The male brain is narrow and highly specialized; the right side of the brain is used for visual activities, the left for verbal. Women, in contrast, employ both sides of their brains for verbal and visual activities.

Some scientists have suggested that because both visual capability and emotions are bundled together exclusively in the right hemisphere of the male brain, the key perceptual sense in the male is vision. Dr. Judith Reisman has noted that this male dependence on the right hemisphere causes men to respond to visual stimuli with more vigor and speed than females.2 This partly explains why the primary market for pornographic images has been male.

Females, on average, use more of their brain space for specific activities, while men use far less. And women employ a greater spectrum of the brain, while men rely more on a specific area of either hemisphere. This results in men naturally focusing narrowly on an issue, while women more naturally see the big picture. Men are able to focus on an issue and be less distracted by anything superfluous going on around them. Ever see a man glued to the TV or the sports page, seemingly oblivious to the chaos around him?3 

Men tend to be more analytical, extracting the essential from the circumstantial detail: “Just the facts, ma'am, just the facts. Women, in contrast, take in the larger picture. They're concerned with context, just as men are forever trying to ignore it for the sake of something they can abstract from it. It's a standoff between brain hemisphere-specific focus vs. wide, hemisphere-diffused focus.4
    
The Corpus Callosum

One body of evidence explains male/female brain differences by examining the corpus callosum, the bundle of some two hundred million fibers that link the left and right sides of the brain. These nerve fibers allow for the interchange of information between the brain's two halves. In the female brain, the corpus callosum is different than in that of the male. In blind tests on fourteen brains obtained after autopsy, scientists found that in women an important area of the corpus callosum was thicker and more bulbous than in men. Overall, this key message-exchange center was bigger (in relation to overall brain weight) in women.5 (Some studies indicate that the corpus callosum may be up to three times larger by weight and density in the female brain than in the male.6)
The hemispheres of a woman's brain share a larger number of connections, suggesting a greater exchange of information between the two sides. Also, more total brain space has been reserved for everyday activities, so that the information she is receiving from the outside world is processed by a much larger portion of her brain.7

In general, women are better at recognizing the emotional nuances in voice, gesture and facial expression, and at interpreting the whole range of sensory information. They can deduce more from such information because they have a greater capacity than men to integrate and cross-relate verbal and visual information, giving credence to woman's intuition or the sixth sense some claim women own.8

Men keep their emotions in check by relying on their right-brain thinking, while their power to express feelings in speech resides in the left hemisphere. Because the two halves of their brains are connected by a smaller number of fibers than those of women, the flow of information between one side of the brain and the other is more restricted.9 Since information is flowing less easily to the verbal, left side of his brain, it is often more difficult for a man to express his emotions. 

Men Concentrate More Narrowly,
While Women See the Big Picture

Studies show that men concentrate more intently on a narrower range of items; they are capable of ignoring distractions because, with a specific part of their brain strictly focused on the task at hand, they are deaf and blind to distractions around them.10

Contrarily, psychologists report that women more regularly think contextually; they take a more “holistic view of the issue at hand. That is, they integrate more details of the world around them, details ranging from the nuances of body posture to the positioning of objects in the room.11

Men are good at compartmentalizing their attention. Just ask a man reading the newspaper a simple question; often he doesn't even consciously hear you. When he does, he appears to rouse himself as if returning from a different planet. Men tend to tune out extraneous stimuli. Their thinking process is, on average, more channeled.12

Women, though, are prone to the opposite. “Whatever they do, even just wiggling their thumbs, women activate more neurons in the brain, reports neuropsychiatrist Mark George of the Medical University of South Carolina. “When a male puts his mind to work, brain scans show neurons turning on in highly specific areas. When females set their minds on similar tasks, so many brain cells light up that their bright-colored brain scans glow like Las Vegas at night.13

Testosterone vs. Estrogen—
Another Key Male/Female Difference

Testosterone, the aggression and dominance hormone, is also the sex hormone, both in men and women. It is the key sexual activator for both sexes.14 Women who lose their ovaries (which produce female hormones) still retain their full capacity for sexual arousal. At menopause, when the ovaries shut down the production of female hormones, women do not lose their appetite for sex, rather it is fueled by testosterone instead. But if they lose the adrenal gland, which produces and controls the flow of testosterone, their libido collapses. It can, however, be restored by testosterone injections.

There are two important differences, however, in how testosterone affects men vs. women. First, a man's brain is better attuned to the effects of testosterone upon it, quite simply because it has been so made through the impact of testosterone in the womb. Secondly, after puberty, a man has 20 times more of the substance in his body than does a woman.15    

Testosterone has been shown to have a significant effect on the male brain, a clinical fact that has been well documented. It is a hormone which seems to make the male brain less liable to fatigue, more single-minded.
By nature, as we have seen, the male brain can more narrowly focus on a specific issue, subject or goal, as well as latch on to that focus more swiftly than the female brain. Testosterone takes the already narrowing male brain and magnifies the narrowing tendency and capacity even further!16
Testosterone also gives the male brain the ability to focus intensely and narrowly on specific issues and interests for long periods of time without tiring. 17
By contrast, we have discussed how the female brain is more diffused and operates on a wide rather than a narrow scale. Just as testosterone further narrows an already narrow male brain, estrogen, the primary female hormone, actually increases the female brain's diffusing or broadening capability.
In her book The First Sex, Helen Fisher writes: “Estrogen builds more dendrite projections or spines on each nerve cell, thereby increasing the number of connecting links between nerve cells. Hence, estrogen facilitates the flow of information among neurons.18

The female brain already owns more communication channels between the two hemispheres than does the male brain. With the addition of estrogen in the female brain, these connections are even more substantial.
In a word, testosterone takes an already narrowing male brain and narrows it even further. Estrogen further diffuses an already expanded female brain. 
 

Two Magnificent Brains Become One 

It is clear that man and woman were meant to be together—not in spite of our differences, but because of them. Ponder for a moment, the incredible strengths of these two wonderful brains. One has the natural, built-in structural and chemical makeup that enables it to narrow tirelessly on a single goal with determination and total focus until it is accomplished, only to then fixate on the next objective and the next. The other possesses the wondrous ability to constantly see the big picture; to take in, consider and assess all that is going on around it; to perform various tasks at once based on this wide perspective. 
Now imagine what happens when these two brains, which seem to be at polar opposites, are suddenly combined together in a wondrous partnership—WOW! What an awesome and unbeatable combination—different, but completely compatible, if we are willing to work at it. 

My wife and I have fun with our “brain differences. Sometimes when I am so narrowed and fixated on a problem and one perceived solution that I can't see any other options, I'll call out to her, “Honey, can I plug into that amazing female brain of yours so I can get a bigger perspective on this? I envision stretching a computer cable from the back of my head and plugging it into hers, and suddenly I can see the world through her brain! Actually, I describe my dilemma to her and she gives me feedback. Without a doubt I can tell you that when it comes to our partnership, two brains are infinitely better than one.     

I hope you can use this understanding of male and female brain differences for two purposes:

1.  How do pornographers exploit male and female brain tendencies in the ways they design and market their wares to each? Why are men generally more susceptible to porn addiction? How can you harness and direct the unique abilities and strengths of your male or female brain to break out of destructive habits and achieve your greatest desires in life?  2.  Knowing the differences, how can you bring the best of both brains together for a happy, harmonious, successful relationship? 

 

For More Information:

If you want to learn more about the Brain Science of Porn Addiction, and how to protect your marriage and family from this addiction, get Mark Kastleman's acclaimed book, “The Drug of the New Millennium. You can purchase it online at Amazon.com.
If you or someone you love is trapped in pornography use, please visit www.candeocan.com to learn how to break free. 

 

Chapter Notes
1. Helen Fisher, The First Sex, Random House, 1999, p. 8 
2. Dr. Judith Reisman, Soft Porn Plays Hardball, Huntington House Publishers, Lafayette, Louisiana, 1991, p. 21
3. Anne Moir & David Jessel, Brain Sex, Ibid.
4. Ibid., p. 170
5. Anne Moir & David Jessel, Brain Sex, Ibid., p. 47
6. From the teachings of Dr. Page Bailey, The Page Bailey Institute International, Behaviorally related programs and tutorial services, Portland,OR offices: 503-775-7668
7. Anne Moir & David Jessel, Brain Sex, Ibid., p. 47, and HelenFisher, The First Sex, Ibid., p. 15
8. Ibid., (Brain Sex) p. 48 
9. Ibid.
10. Ibid., p. 170
11. Helen Fisher, The First Sex, Ibid., p. 5
12. Ibid.
13. Diane Hales, Just Like a Woman, Bantam Books, 1999, p. 244
14. Anne Moir & David Jessel, Brain Sex:, Ibid., p. 103
15. Ibid.
16. Anne Moir & David Jessel, Brain Sex, Ibid., p. 96
17. Ibid., p. 95
18. Helen Fisher, The First Sex, Ibid., p. 62

Pornography & Sexuality—Exploring the Male & Female Brains

1. How do pornographers exploit male and female brain tendencies in the ways they design and market their wares to each? Why are men generally more susceptible to porn addiction?...

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Today is “Safer Internet Day.  People from around the globe are gathering together to discuss and promote a safer online experience for you and your family.  From your desktop and laptop to your smart phone and iTouch, it's important to ensure your kids are protected and empowered to make responsible decisions, regardless of technology they use. 

This year's focus is on “Think B4 U post.  With Net Nanny you can have peace of mind and view all the pictures, friends, videos, and comments your kids post on sites like Facebook and Beebo.  However, we feel that it's more important to be proactive, empower your kids, and help them make good decisions for themselves. Express how sharing an inappropriate message, video or picture can end with severe consequences for everyone involved.

To help celebrate Safer Internet Day, review Net Nanny's Safety Tips with your kids: www.netnanny.com/learn_center/safety_tips 

Safer Internet Day

Today is “Safer Internet Day. People from around the globe are gathering together to discuss and promote a safer online experience for you and your family.

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Internet safety has always been at the forefront of ContentWatch's mantra. But while technology can help ensure a safe online experience, communication, education and good parenting are truly the keys to their safety.  In other words, involved parents are the foundation.

Net Nanny has provided parents with Ten Internet Safety Tips to help protect your family online.  While you can view all ten here, I'd like to expand on three of them. 

Internet Safety and Parental Controls

Internet safety has always been at the forefront of ContentWatch's mantra. But while technology can help ensure a safe online experience, communication, education and good parenting are truly the keys...

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“No one would ever see a drunk, passed out in the gutter, and say, ‘There lies a perfectionist!' But that's exactly what I was! If I couldn't do life perfectly, then I wouldn't bother even trying.


These were the words of a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, describing himself before he was “restored to sanity by the principles and practices of humility contained in the Twelve Steps. 

The following comments were sent to me by a dear friend. See if they ring true in your life experience.

Perfectionism Is At the Core of Almost All Addictive Behavior
I know it sounds like a glaring contradiction, a cruel paradox, but it's absolutely true—most addicts are obsessed with perfection! They perceive that in order to be of any real value; to be loved and accepted, they have to be perfect. And when the pursuit of perfection wears them out, they seek escape through addiction. This then piles on the guilt and shame, and once again they clinch their fists and grit their teeth and start the whole perfection thing again—and so goes the cycle, over and over again. 

I think we react so negatively and mercilessly to imperfection in ourselves and others because we have fallen for a lie that suggests there can be no allowance for learning by our own mistakes. We are constantly shaming and blaming ourselves for not being perfect and we are filled with disgust toward anything less-than-perfect about ourselves or the world around us.

If you think about it, this is really a kind of “perfection idolatry—worshipping perfection as the only way we can be valuable, loveable or “good enough. The irony is that this harsh and unreasonable approach to ourselves and others, only separates us from God, others and ourselves. The fact is, our chance to experience imperfection in this life is exactly the way God intended it to be. 

I couldn't agree with my friend more! She is absolutely right--perfectionism often triggers and fuels addictive behavior. Many of us (I suffered with this for 30 years and I still feel the residue) believe that if we do "everything perfect" then maybe, just maybe we will be "good enough" for God and others to accept us. 

When we set total "perfection" as the daily level of performance we "must" attain to be acceptable to ourselves, God and others, we set ourselves up for failure. Why? Because we have placed a rigid, unreasonable, unattainable burden on our own back that we can only bear for so long until it wears us out. And, it also wears out those around us because we often require the same level of perfection from them as well. Then, when we are exhausted--physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, our "perfectionist--all-or-nothing" attitude says, "If I can't be perfect, then why try?" So, we seek out self-medication to help sooth our feelings of unworthiness, shame and guilt--and to simply have an outlet and get a reprieve from our internal "merciless dictator/critic." If we don't release in this way, we will simply collapse under all the pressure. 

Then, after we escape and self-medicate (which comes in many forms including substance abuse, pornography, food, anger, depression, as well as outlets that are neutral or even healthy) we feel "guilty" for failing to pursue perfection so we start the whole process over again. 

The grand key is to realize that there is only one overriding feeling we should have for ourselves and others—unconditional love. Our Creator's love for us is completely unconditional—we cannot earn it, nor can we make ourselves unworthy of it. It is always there, unconditional and constant. 

With UNCONDITIONAL LOVE as the motive and fuel for everything we do, we realize that we and all of us are in this life to learn by our own experience, by our own trial and error. And hopefully, over time, baby-step by baby-step, we are “becoming better at choosing that is which is good; that which is light and love. 

If you go back to the origins of the word "perfect," it means "complete" or "whole." Each of us has our own unique potential--our own place of "completeness" to be evolving toward. It is a process of making mistakes, learning from them and moving forward. In some things, it may take us 763 of the same mistake before we finally say "I get it! I'm ready to move on!" Does that make us evil, hopeless, flawed or "not one of the good ones"?  Of course not—it makes us “human. It's called "life." 

Does all of this mean we shouldn't try to improve. Certainly not. But, we would all do well to lighten up and be far more gentle, forgiving and compassionate with ourselves and each other. Amidst all our noble efforts to learn and grow and overcome, let's not forget to notice and embrace all of the simple joys and wonders along the way. 

For More Information:
If you want to learn more about the Brain Science of Porn Addiction, and how to protect your marriage and family from this addiction, get Mark Kastleman's acclaimed book, “The Drug of the New Millennium. You can purchase it online at Amazon.com.
If you or someone you love is trapped in pornography use, please visit www.candeocan.com to learn how to break free.  

Perfectionism Fuels Addiction

“No one would ever see a drunk, passed out in the gutter, and say, ‘There lies a perfectionist!' But that's exactly what I was! If I couldn't do life perfectly,...

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If you've been reading our Candeo articles or listening to our podcasts, you know that one of our areas of intense focus is the “brain science behind pornography addiction. In our full recovery training program, we explore this brain science in great detail. We look at questions like: How does pornography viewing alter the physical and chemical structure of the brain? How does addiction circuitry develop in the brain and why does it have such a radical impact on human behavior? Once this addiction circuitry is formed, how does one shrink this circuitry, build new healthy circuitry and return to healthy behaviors?

You Have an Amazing Brain!

If you've been reading our Candeo articles or listening to our podcasts, you know that one of our areas of intense focus is the “brain science behind pornography addiction.

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After decades of helping individuals work through their addiction to pornography, I'm still amazed by the consistency of the responses I see in both the addict and those who care about him or her. When one is shackled in porn use, he or she is usually deeply frustrated and greatly perplexed by the power of their addiction—especially by the fact that when they feel the “urge wash over them, they temporarily jettison everyone and everything they care about to indulge in porn or some other sexual behavior. Afterward, they can't understand why their will power and self-discipline were so weak! At the same time, those who care about the addict feel tremendous frustration each time he or she gives in to the addiction—“Why can't you just say no! “You just need to learn to control yourself!
To understand why an addict has little or no will power and self-discipline when faced with the overwhelming urge to indulge in his addiction, you must first understand what addiction does to the brain. In the forehead area or Frontal Lobes area of the brain is the control/executive center. This is the most advanced part of our brain—what makes us human. It is the area of the brain that has to do with will, self-discipline, anticipation of consequences, reasoning, planning, and goal-setting. Addictions inhibit this part of the brain and reduce these capacities. This is one reason why addicts are so “surprised after they have indulged in violation of their own values, beliefs, resolutions, goals, memory of past consequences, etc.  
Because addictive behaviors spawn from the Limbic System or reward-pleasure-appetite-emotion-driven part of the brain, and are accompanied by a tidal wave of endogenous chemicals (natural morphine-like chemicals produced by the brain) once the individual makes up his mind to start down the path of indulgence, the frontal lobes are, as it were, “blocked out dramatically reducing “will-power and “self-control. It's like battling the addiction with only 50%, 30%, or even 20% or less of one's will, self-discipline, and self-control in operation. This is one reason why people who have never been addicted will say, “Why don't you just quit? or “Why don't you just stop looking at it? assuming that if they were addicted they could control it. 
Of course they arrive at this reasoning with 100% of their will, self-discipline, and faculties in-tact. What they don't realize is that with the logic/self-control centers of the brain severely handicapped, overcoming the urge to indulge is like running a race severely crippled. For the addict, the whole process is extremely frustrating and disheartening, because they want to quit, but it seems the harder they try the more powerless they become. 
What we know, is that without the correct knowledge, tools and relevant skills, facing one's addiction is really not a fair fight!

We Live in an Age of Addiction
We all are prime targets for addiction. We lead hectic, fast-paced, anxiety-filled lives. We often base our self-worth on our accomplishments. We drive ourselves further and further to achieve. Peace and confidence are often elusive for many good-hearted souls. As we continue to push ourselves harder and faster, we become more tired, stressed, and often more isolated. 
To help you consider further “how your addiction has advanced to where it is today, consider the example of the college student. Keep in mind that this example with just a few adjustments could describe the burned-out businessman, financially-buried single mom, and many other individuals who are struggling with the trials of life. As you read this example, ponder how it reflects your own situation:

The College Student
Imagine an individual who excitedly enters college with a burning desire to gain valuable knowledge and skills. He wants to invest in himself and develop his talents and abilities. However, he soon discovers that he is surrounded by other bright, talented and ambitious people in a very competitive and rigorous environment. He's not only in school, but he has a job in order to finance his schooling. He finds himself not just jogging, but sprinting in a rat race to just to keep up. Before long he is exhausted, but he doesn't give up; he can't slow down. He continues to work, study and sacrifice day in and day out, week after week, month after month, often for years. 
He finds himself isolated and lonely because of a lack of time, social opportunities and energy. The intense daily competition leaves him feeling insecure and questioning his own worth, uniqueness, talents and abilities. He often rises early in the morning to study, attends classes, works to earn a little spending money, studies some more in the evening, and arrives home exhausted. He has little opportunity to really “play and enjoy leisure time. He begins experiencing emotional burnout and mental and physical fatigue. Before long he finds himself craving pleasure and escape. He doesn't have much time for such things. He is a prime target and set-up for Internet porn.
He discovers that pornography is an easy, quick and cheap source of pleasure and escape. It is exciting and arousing—an extreme and intense amount of pleasure in a short period of time. Reaching climax stimulates his parasympathetic nervous system, providing instant relaxation and calmness. In fact, he even begins using self-stimulation and climax as a way to “be able to relax and go to sleep.  
Within a short period of time the student develops an addiction. He begins accessing pornography more and more often. It starts interfering with his studies and ability to focus and concentrate. He feels guilty about his behavior and tries to stop, but finds himself going back again and again. He tries to avoid even thinking about pornography and self-stimulation, and begins to fear these thoughts and his “out-of-control behavior. The more he fights the thoughts, the more they force their way into his mind. Eventually, worn out by the struggle, he gives in and finds temporary relief, only to start the obsessive/compulsive cycle all over again. 
This bright, young, honorable man finds himself shackled in chains, entrapped both in an addiction and in an obsession/compulsion. The more he tries to stop, the more difficult it becomes. The intense guilt, helplessness and discouragement become overwhelming.
Change a few of the particulars, and this story might generally describe your addiction. What this young man doesn't realize, and what you may not know, is that addiction severely alters and handicaps the Frontal Lobes, robbing the addict of his will power and self-control. While this is most certainly not an excuse or justification, it definitely explains a great deal about an addict's behavior! If the explanation ended here, there would be little hope for those who struggle under the heavy burden of addiction. But, what I have described is only the beginning! 
What I know after decades of experience helping addicts, and what the latest brain imaging studies clearly prove is this:  Frontal lobes that have been damaged by years of addiction can be healed and restored to their proper function! Yes, you can fully regain your will power and self-control! It takes time and effort. It requires that you gain the right knowledge, tools and skills. The point is, it can be done! That is what the Candeo program is all about—helping you successfully progress down the path of fully regaining your ability to choose; your free will; your self-esteem and self-confidence. Many have regained their lives and so can you. All you need do is start moving forward one step at a time down the recovery path. Let Candeo help you take your first step today. For more information, visit www.candeocan.com

Porn Can Cripple Your Will Power!

After decades of helping individuals work through their addiction to pornography, I'm still amazed by the consistency of the responses I see in both the addict and those who care...

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by Dr. Bernell Christensen, Candeo Co-founder

 As I look back on my 30+ years as an “in the trenches therapist, I can tell you that my clients suffering under the burden of pornography use and other sexual addictions, have come from all walks of life. There has never been one, single set of identifying characteristics under which I could place all those who struggle with this addiction. While I have known about this diversity for many years, our Candeo online recovery training program has brought this to light in ways I never imagined.  

People are often surprised to learn that we have individuals (we call them Candeo Students) engaged in our addiction recovery training program from all 50 states in the U.S. and in 35 countries! But the diversity is not just geographical. Candeo Students come from a wide variety of cultures, backgrounds, religious affiliations, education and economic levels. We have both men and women on our program, and they range in age from 13 to 80. Our recovery students hail from many different professions including teachers, doctors, business owners, military, clergy, therapists, CEOs, politicians and a lot more. Many of our Students are also students in colleges and schools across the globe. Does this diversity surprise you? What is it about pornography addiction that allows it to cross all boundaries and entrap men, women and children world-wide? 

 Many have assumed that the common denominator is religion—people are disturbed and obsessed about their porn use because of their religious beliefs. While this is certainly a contributing factor, it is far from being the rule—we have a significant number of Students who are non-religious. Some claim that this is strictly a “male addiction—a growing number of our Students are female. It would seem to make sense that internet porn addiction is more prevalent among the younger generation who are more “tech savvy. While many of our Students are in their 20s and 30s, we regularly help those much older. So if predicting porn addiction can’t be confined to age, gender, culture, religion or profession, then what is the common denominator among those who become entrapped? Taking the risk of sounding over-simplistic, or even ridiculous, I’ll tell you what it is: the common denominator among pornography addicts is that they all have a brain. 

 Now, before you dismiss this as “silly, or assume I’m making an inept attempt at humor, stay with me for a moment. The reason pornography can titillate, entrap and enslave people of all types all over the world, is because of the effect porn has on the human brain. We all have a brain. We all are “sexual beings. Built into the very fabric of our DNA coding is programming that causes us to respond in some way to the sexual stimuli and queues that are all around us. This incredibly powerful force motivates us to seek relationships, pair off and propagate our species. In so many ways, sexuality is an amazing gift to be embraced and enjoyed. While sexual processes are carried out in many parts of the body, nowhere are they more numerous, complex and powerful than in the human brain. During sexual intimacy, the brain releases remarkable and very potent neuro-chemicals, which allow us to narrowly focus our attention, feel pleasure, release stress, connect and bond, and receive many other benefits. Many neuropsychologists have referred to sex as a “drug because it triggers the release of chemicals that are in many ways identical to those released during drug use. Any way you look at it, sex has a big impact on the human brain and the entire nervous system. 

So what does all of this have to do with pornography? According to research in neuro-science, psychology and the latest brain scanning technology, the viewing of pornography creates the same type of brain response that having sex does. In fact, from a neuro-chemical standpoint, when porn viewing and masturbation are engaged in, the brain believes the body is actually having sex. So, at the push of a mouse button, any time of the day or night, any individual across the globe with an internet connection can instantly engage in sexual process. He or she can flood their brain and nervous system with powerful neuro-chemicals that in many ways have the same effect as street drugs. They can instantly produce pleasure and self-medicate their stress, loneliness, boredom, anger, fear and any other negative emotion. Now do you see why the one universal, common denominator among porn addicts world-wide is “they have a brain?

The good news is, the Candeo Online Recovery Training Program was designed to help anyone across the world with pornography addiction. All you need is an internet connection and basic skills with the English language. Just as pornographers tap into and take advantage of the brain and its built-in sexual processes, Candeo teaches individuals how to harness and direct the brain’s incredible power for change. Everything you need to break free is already built in to that magnificent brain of yours! And that remarkable ability for positive change is something universal to every person on the planet.     
     
For More Information:
If you want to learn more about the Brain Science of Porn Addiction, and how to protect your marriage and family from this addiction, get Mark Kastleman’s acclaimed book, “The Drug of the New Millennium. You can purchase it online at Amazon.com.
If you or someone you love is trapped in pornography use, please visitwww.candeocan.com to learn how to break free. 

Porn Addiction is All Over the World; And so is the Ability to Break Free.

by Dr. Bernell Christensen, Candeo Co-founder As I look back on my 30+ years as an “in the trenches therapist, I can tell you that my clients suffering under the...

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Associated Press recently released an article discussing how some internet filtering products actually gather and sell your private information.  In most cases, this includes, but is not limited to, private IM or Chat conversations and Internet browsing history.

“Software sold under the Sentry and FamilySafe brands can read private chats conducted through Yahoo, MSN, AOL and other services, and send back data on what kids are saying about such things as movies, music or video games. The information is then offered to businesses seeking ways to tailor their marketing messages to kids.

Although Net Nanny will capture and log conversations through Yahoo, MSN, AOL and other services, parents have the option to enable/disable remote reporting.  If enabled, this data is encrypted and securely sent to our servers where only you can authorize access to that data. Net Nanny will never share your personal browsing history or children's IM (Instant Message) conversations with any third parties.  Net Nanny believes in keeping your family’s privacy secure.

In addition to avoiding companies that engage in the unauthorized selling of your personal Internet activities, you may want to watch out for Parental Control products that “data mine.  Data mining is the process of analyzing or gathering specific data, usually for the use of identifying customer interests and patterns.  Many software companies, including some parental control vendors, may be using your information for data mining.  It’s well known that many URL-based internet filtering companies will actually use your browsing history to help expand its constantly growing list of websites; unlike Net Nanny which uses dynamic contextual analysis.  Rest assured, Net Nanny will never share, sell, or disclose your personal information. We are in the business of keeping your family safe.

Watch Out, Some Parental Control Products Sell Your Private Info

Associated Press recently released an article discussing how some internet filtering products actually gather and sell your private information.

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5
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10
Devices

Family Pass

$9
per device

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25%

$119.99 $89.99

Net Nanny for Android® & Internet Filter for iOS® available exclusively
with the Family Protection Pass.

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Mac Windows Android IOS